here we go

by SKYOWNER

simba rafiki

maaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhn-sibenya-agabadeetzababa!

oh yeah. Oh Yeah. OHHHH YEAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

after years of people saying “i love these guys, when are they coming to ______ (insert any town besides phoenix)” and getting a blank stare in response, spafford has officially announced tour dates in the midwest. and even better, they’ve partnered with live for live music to make this happen.

their facebook post last month had a lot of us thinking that more dates would be added to the two colorado shows, and it’s great to see that our waiting paid off. reading this at work in real time as it came out today, i was beyond pumped. numerous ric flair woo’s were screamed when i read the announcement.

this is a huge deal, and finally seeing it made official, i was so excited i got up and just started pacing around my office, unknowingly walking outside to the parking lot not having any clue how to react other than going full lattimer on all the parked cars.

when i came back inside, stacey, the office manager, noticed the growing sweat circle around my supple bosom and said “you look like you’ve been breastfeeding.”

that was uncalled for, stacey.

“well you look like you just won a hobo fisting contest” i replied.

“and i wasn’t breastfeeding. i was outside doing jumping jacks and running wind sprints. i also did a hundred pushups in twelve minutes,” all of which was true.

“why?” stacey asked, mouth agape, looking like an incredulous yokel.

there was only one answer, and “spafford is finally touring!” wasn’t it.

instead, i karate chopped the salad she was eating for lunch out of her hands and started air guitaring the solo from the 8/9/14 taco stand right in her face, thrusting my hips and grunting in time the way brian should but doesn’t.

stacey was not amused, but after getting doused in sweat and watching my luscious blonde hair bounce like fields of wheat dancing in the wind, she acquiesced to my demand that she blast the boulder windmill and let the tps reports review themselves.

five minutes into the jam and she agreed to be my tour wife. we consummated instantly in the office storage room. i won’t comment on which one of us screamed “big red” as our bodies writhed in ecstasy to the song’s -and each other’s- climax.

now, corporate wookery aside, the point of celebrating today is that all of us love these five guys, and the time has come for music’s best kept secret to let the rest of the country in on what we’ve been raving about for the last few years. like parents sending a child off to college, our boys are all growns up.

the only other time they’ve left the southwest for an extended period was the glorious and myth-building may/june 2014 tour. they haven’t had the reach where it made sense for them to play, i don’t know, a place like salt lake city on a tuesday night to an audience of one bartender who’s more interested in the mormon tabernacle choir than a 45 minute improvisational jam.

right now, my heart is pounding and even after flagstaff last weekend i wish there was a show tonight. i’m sure a lot of you are feeling the same way. the tour is still a ways off, though, and as always, we need to help get the word out. the excitement we’re feeling today has to carry over to a random conversation a month from now with someone who lives in lincoln, milwaukee, this neenah place, chicago or dekalb. get them to the show.

and if someone says they’ve never heard of spafford, don’t slap them in the mouth or belittle their ancestors as we’ve instinctively trained ourselves to do. just smile and play them a nice soundcheck to ease them in. the music will take care of the rest.

this is a really important tour for the band. they’ve killed it in arizona for years, they’ve made a ton of headway in denver recently, but the midwest and eventually the north east are still where they need to repeatedly deliver in order to make themselves a national touring act. the hard part is done- they have the music, they just need a lot more people to play in front of. word of mouth is how this thing’s going to grow.

finally, here’s a self-serving link to share with someone who may not know where to start with the live stuff, and of course there’s always the band’s own official soundboard page on soundcloud, full shows on the archive, and their facebook page.

see you in the promised land, nerds.

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